Wednesday, December 22, 2010

cyclical

I just noticed most of my posts are between October and March. I'm not really sure what to attribute that too. I'm trying to recall the majority of my breakups-- I think the majority of them happened in November so that might have something to do with it.

I've spent a lot of time thinking over the last few days. Life is somewhat at a standstill in these winter months-- a thick permafrost that will not soon thaw. I really feel like I'm going to be here-- in this space for awhile.

Okay, so currently I'm in the middle of a deployment for work. I love it when a 15 minute job turns into an hour. I'm definitely ready to move off this project and on to the next one.

Hmmm other thoughts-- what do I have to look forward to?

Mexico Trip in less than 2 weeks.

Possible Ski trip.

yeah I guess there isn't a whole lot poppin' right now. The Mexico trip should be tight though. I'm planning to go to the Philippines after Mexico, I'm not sure what the time frame will be just yet but I'll put a few G's away and pay for it up front so I know I'll stay committed (insert whorish prostitution joke or wife joke here).

(15 minutes later) CRAAAAAP what is up with this deployment.

One of my coworkers has peaked my interest. He's a bit older than myself, on the dating scene. Apparently we're so similar we attract the same women and people continually get us confused. In fact, V may have slept with him years before I even met V-- so I guess that makes us eskimo brothers? I didn't confirm the details. In any case, he's been in the game much longer than my pitiful one year of the single lifestyle. Interestingly enough we've come to the same conclusions about the majority of women. Hell, one of my better female friends actually confirmed my logic. The majority of black women are pretty uncultured and to a larger extent dumb. I'm not necessarily talking about books smart, some are very well educated and very well read. However, some of the things that come out of their mouths baffle me. The contradictions kill me. For example, suggesting we go ice skating because its new and different even though you really don't like ice skating but think I might think more of you because you're not being typical. Another example-- saying you're trying new foods but refusing to eat anything that isn't American (especially at nicer restaurants). I'm texting M right now, just the standard questions...her definition of an alpha male 'A man who likes sports and watches them. He is protective of his property and lays claim loudly to what is his and belongs to him. He is competitive and unapologetic for his masculinity. He is a man and worthy of the term. Yet smart, gentle and kin towards his lady'. (sigh) pretty sure this is going down hill.

I wonder what black church beat this imagery of the 'perfect' man into her head. Hmm apparently she hasn't been with a man with these alpha male qualities-- my haunch is that this is a good fantasy, but in reality a man with this character would be a nightmare to deal with on a daily basis. She sounds like she's had very little relationship experience. This is likely not worth pursuing and I am unwilling to deal with suck closed mindedness at this age (more leeway for those women 32+).

Overall, I'm having a tough time understanding and accepting how rigid most black women are. I am beginning to suspect that the problem is their perception...

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